Sometimes I Think About Dying (2024)

3 1/2 Stars (out of 4)

Office Grace

By Jeffrey M. Anderson

Despite its deceptively gloomy title, Rachel Lambert's Sometimes I Think About Dying, a lovely, small wisp of a movie, explores themes of loneliness, trust, and perhaps even fate, with a beguilingly quiet sense of poetry and mystery.

Fran (Daisy Ridley) lives in a small, gray, drizzly town in Oregon and works in an office making spreadsheets. She keeps to herself, goes home to a meal of cottage cheese, a glass of wine, and a game of Sudoku, before going to bed. The only thing that breaks up her day are occasional visions of her own death. One day a new employee comes on board. He is Robert (Dave Merheje), balding, bearded, and bespectacled, but jovial and outgoing.

It's not long before Robert invites Fran out to the movies, and then to pie. Both seem to have a good time, and they even receive an invitation to a party that weekend. But the next day at the office, Robert acts like nothing happened. Their next couple of outings, including dinner and a movie at Robert's house, and a "murder mystery" party, end ambiguously, with Fran unable to really open up. But a chance encounter at a cafe may change Fran's outlook.

Based loosely on a play by Kevin Armento, and on a short film by Armento, Stefanie Abel Horowitz, and Katy Wright-Mead, Sometimes I Think About Dying has the intimacy and perceptiveness of a fine short story. It's keenly aware of the banality of office talk, but also finds poetry in its nothingness. Director Rachel Lambert beautifully incorporates the gray small town atmosphere into the story and themes (the very first image is a fallen piece of fruit rolling to join its fellows in the gutter).

The Fran character is a cipher. She barely speaks, and there is no explanation for her fantasies of death and her reticence to be around others. Yet Ridley plays her straight, with a truthful emotional center, so that whatever pain she feels is genuine. (She's not a "quirky indie movie" character.) Robert is a perfect foil for her. Their connection may not be totally romantic or perfect — they are pretty much opposites — but it is a connection.

Best of all is that Fran's awakening — which is more like a small, kind gesture — has little to do with Robert. Rather, it involves her seeing another character as a human being for the first time. Sometimes I think About Dying understands that loneliness may or may not be solved by romance, and that another possible solution may simply be opening our eyes to the world.